When I left the house this morning, I felt good. For once, I felt happy with my entire outfit.
My black jumper seemed to provide a flattering fit, my layering tee was not bunching up in the back and I had finally decided to wear my brand new, zebra print tights.
I had pep in my step as I
skipped walked to the bus stop.
Life was good.
The sun was out, the birds sang, and no dogs ran to bite me in the
Sadly, this feel good feeling lasted all of five minutes.
As I looked for my bus ticket, I made eye contact with a statuesque, blonde-haired goddess who like me, had the misfortune of having to travel on public transport.
However, unlike me, she boasted beautiful, long, flowing blonde hair, a to die for vintage coat, and legs so long they seemed to go for miles.
All of a sudden, I felt like a hopeful Oompa Loompa on her way to a casting for an indie sequel to Charlie and the Chocolate Factory but who had first stopped to slay a wild animal.
All of my insecurities made their way to the surface and left me feeling like road kill.
Which brings me to ask, why do women do this to themselves, ladies?
Why must we constantly compare and contrast ourselves to other women?
Why do we oftentimes feel threatened by the presence of a beautiful woman?
You’d think that for all of our talk of loyalty to the sisterhood, this wouldn’t be the case.
But alas, not so.
Ironically, the opposite gender, while not as pretty as we are, does not behave in such a petty fashion.
In conference with the son, the Significant Other and some of my male friends, I’ve been able to ascertain that the only times men actually size each other up or not, is when they’re standing in front of a mirror next to another guy lifting free weights and never, ever, do they do it in a public restroom.
Two answers, ladies, and one of them doesn’t even count as a time they actually incur in the practice!
Needless to say, we’re totally different.
A man walks into a room full of men and ten minutes later he’s bonded with every guy in the place as they happily discuss the make and model of their dream car.
A woman walks into a room full of women and five seconds later she’s assessed what every other female in the rooms is wearing, she’s inventoried how many Choos, Manolos and Payless shoes are present and she’s identified who’s had a “little work” done.
And don’t shake your head side to side cause you know it’s true.
We may not always verbalize the results of our visual inspection but in our minds, we know what the stats are.
Sometimes these stats scare us and other times they make us feel like the prettiest girl at the ball.
Fortunately, it doesn’t have to be like this.
We have the power to realize that we don’t have to feel threatened.
We simply have to do search and rescue for a little something called self-confidence.
Those in possession of it claim that it has super powers.
Those who exude it, have nothing to fear for it envelops you, shrouds you, and protects you.
But we can only find it when we believe we are worthy.
There was no reason for me to feel like an Oompa Loompa this morning.
I did that to myself.
I allowed insecurities to do a hostile corporate takeover when all I had to do was invoke feelings of self-confidence.
I could’ve of pulled my shoulders back, taken a deep breath and admired my silhouette.
But instead I permitted a moment of low self-esteem to blind me to the fact that we were both attractive in our own way.
Sometimes all it takes to find our inner diva is a little reminding; reminding ourselves that we are all beautiful.
Cheesy at that sounds, it’s the truth.
So own this truth, ladies, and don’t ever feel like you’re less than what you are, a queen.