Zebra tights anyone?

cc licensed flickr photo shared by wwarby

When I left the house this morning, I felt good. For once, I felt happy with my entire outfit.

My black jumper seemed to provide a flattering fit, my layering tee was not bunching up in the back and I had finally decided to wear my brand new, zebra print tights.

I had pep in my step as Iskipped walked to the bus stop.

Life was good.

The sun was out, the birds sang, and no dogs ran to bite me in the cankles ankles.

Sadly, this feel good feeling lasted all of five minutes.

As I looked for my bus ticket, I made eye contact with a statuesque, blonde-haired goddess who like me, had the misfortune of having to travel on public transport.

However, unlike me, she boasted beautiful, long, flowing blonde hair, a to die for vintage coat, and legs so long they seemed to go for miles.

All of a sudden, I felt like a hopeful Oompa Loompa on her way to a casting for an indie sequel to Charlie and the Chocolate Factory but who had first stopped to slay a wild animal.

All of my insecurities made their way to the surface and left me feeling like road kill.

Which brings me to ask, why do women do this to themselves, ladies?

Why must we constantly compare and contrast ourselves to other women?

Why do we oftentimes feel threatened by the presence of a beautiful woman?

You’d think that for all of our talk of loyalty to the sisterhood, this wouldn’t be the case.

But alas, not so.

Ironically, the opposite gender, while not as pretty as we are, does not behave in such a petty fashion.

In conference with the son, the Significant Other and some of my male friends, I’ve been able to ascertain that the only times men actually size each other up or not, is when they’re standing in front of a mirror next to another guy lifting free weights and never, ever, do they do it in a public restroom.

Two answers, ladies, and one of them doesn’t even count as a time they actually incur in the practice!

Needless to say, we’re totally different.

A man walks into a room full of men and ten minutes later he’s bonded with every guy in the place as they happily discuss the make and model of their dream car.

A woman walks into a room full of women and five seconds later she’s assessed what every other female in the rooms is wearing, she’s inventoried how many Choos, Manolos and Payless shoes are present and she’s identified who’s had a “little work” done.

And don’t shake your head side to side cause you know it’s true.

We may not always verbalize the results of our visual inspection but in our minds, we know what the stats are.

Sometimes these stats scare us and other times they make us feel like the prettiest girl at the ball.

Fortunately, it doesn’t have to be like this.

We have the power to realize that we don’t have to feel threatened.

We simply have to do search and rescue for a little something called self-confidence.

Those in possession of it claim that it has super powers.

Those who exude it, have nothing to fear for it envelops you, shrouds you, and protects you.

But we can only find it when we believe we are worthy.

There was no reason for me to feel like an Oompa Loompa this morning.

I did that to myself.

I allowed insecurities to do a hostile corporate takeover when all I had to do was invoke feelings of self-confidence.

I could’ve of pulled my shoulders back, taken a deep breath and admired my silhouette.

But instead I permitted a moment of low self-esteem to blind me to the fact that we were both attractive in our own way.

Sometimes all it takes to find our inner diva is a little reminding; reminding ourselves that we are all beautiful.

Cheesy at that sounds, it’s the truth.

So own this truth, ladies, and don’t ever feel like you’re less than what you are, a queen.

Now who wants to celebrate this discovery by wearing zebra tights tomorrow?


26 thoughts on “Zebra tights anyone?

  1. I would wear zebra tights in celebration … except i don’t have a pair! It must be something inane for women to compare and contrast. Sometimes i find myself chanting “Lift your head up high” x 10 and then walk past the beautiful woman with head held high. LOL.

  2. Bella, I have felt this way so many times. I look up and see ‘her’ and suddenly I feel childish and over-colorful. The thing that I try to remember is this— there isn’t a cap on beauty. Her beauty does not take away mine– there’s plenty of it to go around.

    I love this post and I am so glad you wrote it!

  3. I bet you anything that, the blonde woman was jealous of your tights and that there was something in the back of her head she was doubting about herself. We all do that to ourselves, whether we’re fat, thin, short, tall, etc. I think the one great thing about women is they can always see something in another woman that they admire or wish they had. She was wishing for your great tights and i’m sure other traits too.

    1. You have me feelin’ all better, lady! That’s right! She better be envious of my cute, out of this world, animal print tights! :)

  4. I dont have Zebra tights but I do have have leopard leggings which I wear with pride and when I do I wear them I walk into place like I own them grrrrrrrrrr . !!!

  5. lady, I agree with you: we need to hold our self esteem high and remember we are Extremously Attractive and Beautiful Ladies, no matter what happen!. I have no zebra tights, but I can hum ‘Dancing Queen’ (Abba) and wear a feather boa!: it’s such a funny thing to do!

    1. Señora Allnut, you have me giggling like crazy here! The Significant Other once again has that look that signifies he’s worried I may just be losing it permanently! :) OMG you would look stupendous in a boa!

  6. SUCH a true post. My “sizing up” of other women is a quality that I really don’t like about myself… And my sizing down of me in comparison to other women is a quality I hate even MORE.
    If I had zebra tights I would totally wear them tomorrow in solidarity sister! Totally.

    My ONLY complaint is… WHERE IS THE PICTURE OF YOU IN YOUR ZEBRA TIGHTS???? Bring it, girl.

    Leaving the House in THIS?!?!

    1. Molly, you are hysterical, woman! And honest. I mean, not many of us admit to being naughty and sizing up and sizing down! Good for you for letting it all out in the open! :) I definitely owe you a picture of my legs in zebra tights!

  7. bella! ure pics DO NOT look like a mug shot. stop it! lol. and thanks for such an inspiring post. u say it well girl. and zebra tights – why not? ;-)

  8. Bella, I have mentioned before that I work with a bunch of guys, and you are right, they never size each other up. They bumble along, punching and joking and no one gets hurt feelings over an imagined look or bitchy comment. It is refreshing actually. I need to follow these goofballs’ example and be nicer to myself!

    1. I know what you mean! The Significant Other has the ability to meet a group of men for the first time and after five minutes you would think he’d been friends with them all of his life! It’s sickening, really! :)

  9. I’m working on it… but I’m the one who only just last week wore a dress voluntarily for the first time in years! I don’t count my wedding dress, because it covered what I always hide. My lumpy, weird legs.

    So I’m unlikely to wear zebra tights, but I’d live to see them on you!

  10. I know how you feel — how did we get so programmed to just compare ourselves with such scrutiny to everyone?
    Why do we leave the house feeling our cutest – and come home feeling like failures?
    Ohhh that self confidence. If only you could just buy it in the grocery store.

  11. I NEVER compare myself to any other chick girl….especially if she is a different category…I do remember a pair of turquoise leopard print jeans I owned in the 80’s….I wish I still fit into them I would wear them EVERYWHERE….xoxoxoxo

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