Here I am again with another underpants post.
I know it’s soon after the last one, but seriously ladies, I feel it is my civic duty to create awareness to a little problem I’ve encountered as of late.
As of late?
Lets be honest; since like forever.
As you all know, I’m on the quest (aren’t we all?) to find a pair of perfect-fitting underpants.
I’m currently down to one pair that fits relatively well, but it’s being held together by a prayer.
Quite frankly, I don’t know how much fight they have left.
But I digress.
This weekend, I set out once more; determined to return home with the prize.
However, the pursuit of the perfect pair of panties has become quite challenging because everywhere I go, women are dead bent on establishing the trend to bring along their ball and chain to shop for their unmentionables.
I visited three lingerie departments, and to my dismay, every one of them had some irritating, little couple perusing underwear like they were picking out bone china.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for dragging the man of the house to places like the supermarket, for example, so he can lug bags home on a bike, on the bus, or walk with them strapped to his back if need be.
But when the heck did men start to tag along to buy sports bras and Spanx?
Which brings me to bras.
I don’t know about the rest of you, but most of the time, I don’t bother to go into the dressing room to try on a bra.
I simply throw that bad boy on over my shirt to see if it fits or not.
Today I caught a guy staring at me over a rack of tankinis as I carried out this procedure.
In the meantime, his wife/girlfriend/sister/lover was standing just two feet away.
This makes me wonder if I should stop trying bras on in public, or if men should keep their asses at home and watch tv or whatever it is they do on the weekends.
I have never taken the Significant Other lingerie shopping.
As a matter of fact, I rarely take him shopping.
Because men are not built for it, ladies.
It’s not in their DNA; they don’t have what it takes.
So why do some of us insist on dragging them along?
And to make matters worse, foist them on other sisters who are trying to find a decent pair of underpants?
Why must we complicate our lives and the lives of other women this way?
I say keep those men at home.
If you feel that your man has to partake in the purchase of your lingerie, make it a couple activity, do it in the privacy of your home, and order it online.
Please allow the rest of us to shop for our skivvies without having to worry what the men in the “women’s” lingerie department will think when we make a bee line for the granny panties, or when we ask a sales clerk for body shaping undergarments, or garters, or a girdle, or even a pair of crotchless underpants for heaven’s sake.
Leave those men at home and allow us to find the right fitting underpants already!
I’m begging you!